dragging in the new year...

i still havent got into the swing of this whole new year thing...i never make resolutions...mainly because i know i won't stick to them...but this year i decided that i would make a few...the first one being to lose weight (original i know!!)....anyway in the days leading up to jan. 1 i kept thinking, in a few more days i am going to be back on a strict diet...so maybe i can just splurge a little...

so here i sit on jan. 4th still splurging a little and pretending that the new year hasnt arrived...ugh

i would like to say that i STILL have not had a diet coke (or any other carbonated beverage) since nov. 23...i wish i could say that i am over the whole diet coke addiction...but i think i am not...and i have not felt 'normal' since i stopped drinking it...i mean i have physically not felt normal...i dont know if it is a coincidence that i have felt like crap since i stopped the diet coke...but i really think that it has done some weird things to me...

i had this strange dreams a few weeks ago...

i was standing in front of my refrigerator and i was holding something in my hand...i didnt know what it was...but i turned it up and starting drinking it...gulp after gulp i could just feel myself beginning to feel really good...i mean it was the best feeling in the world...i remember thinking to myself in the dream, that i felt normal...no aches or pains...i put the drink on the top shelf of the fridge and i looked down at it...to my horror it was diet coke...so i quickly grabbed it and poured it out because i knew i couldnt resist drinking the rest of it...then i woke up...weird.

i told phillip about my dream and he said...hmm...addicts have dreams like that....gee thanks phil! ;P

then there was this little event:

we were at this fish fry fund raiser kinda thing...and i was going to get something to drink...i wanted water...so i asked some one where it was...they told me it was in a cooler of ice with the diet coke...hmm..ok...

so i go over to the cooler and i start digging through the ice looking for a bottle of water...and everytime i shove my hand down into the ice and move it around...a diet coke pops up...it keeps happening 3 or 4 times...diet cokes just keep popping up like they are teasing me...but the weird thing was that every time a diet coke would pop up...i would get this freaky feeling...almost like a shiver going through me...i had the strongest urge to start grabbing those cokes and drinking them as fast as i could...it was really strange...but i managed to get through the night with only water...

i think if drinking diet coke again would make me feel normal...then i would run out and buy cases of it and just drink it until i couldnt drink anymore...ugh

the other night phillip and i were sitting in the living room...and i looked around and this is what i saw...a heated neck massager...a heated foot soaker...phillip with a heating pad on his knee (he has been having some serious joint pain) and the smell of icy hot hung in the room like smoke in a pool hall...i just laughed and said you know...we really need to start acting our age...i am not sure what happened but i think we both got old over night... :(

i wondered for a moment if maybe our 'ailments' could be effecting the kids...then i saw this:

yep...that is none other than jonah (my soon to be TWO year old) laying in the bed with a walking cane in his hand!!! HAHAHA

oh well...here's to a good new year...right???? BLEH!